January 2012
18 posts
This is too much time away from him.
For the first time in these past 3 weeks, I’m actually sad. I’ve tried to be relaxed and happy, and it has worked so far. But today, today his absence genuinely hurts my heart more than usual. For completely selfish reasons, he needs to come home.
I’m not terrible for wanting that, right?
Anonymous asked: How are you and vladimirblue? It's like you don't talk about him anymore. :( You didn't break up did you? :(
I feel so young.
Coworker: Can you change the signature on this phone? I just can't figure out how to work it.
Me: Why yes. Yes I can.
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Straight clubs suck.
They are filled with people who can’t dance. Plus, the love isn’t there. “No cocks on the box”.
What is that even?? Cocks are the best.
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I just slept on the most comfortable mattress.
Vlad, we are going tempurpedic.
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There is nothing more awkward than
your mother-in-law walking in on you masturbating.
Just happened.
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That irritating moment when
the same song is on EVERY station.
I'm sitting down.
Me: I don't feel well. Brittany, coddle me.
*She puts pelvic area in my face*
Me: Ew, not cooter! Coddle!
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Joke that a child told me.
Child: How do you get a tissue to dance?
Me: I don't know. How?
Child: Put a boogie in it!
*Child proceeds to laugh hysterically.
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Captain Morgan and I got into a fight.
He’s a pirate. So of course he won.
I'm beginning to find politics interesting.
Hello adulthood.
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Haha! What?
Vivian: Your grandmother used to hide in coffins and scare people.
Vlad: She was a mortician?
Vivian: No, she just liked to bother people.
December 2011
28 posts
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Watch
Anonymous asked: your long hair is so pretty :(
That moment when Nickelback comes on
and your ears bleed.
4 tags
So I took a looksie at the Xmas tree.
I have five gifts! Three are from Vlad and two are from his mom. I’m very happy.
Can’t wait to see what she got me. And I can’t wait for her to see my gift to her.
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The past two days
have been dedicated to Halo, reading, and Vlad.
Bacon controls my life.
It’s my favorite word. My favorite actor is Kevin Bacon. My favorite commercial is the one where the dog says “It’s bacon!!!”.
It’s everywhere and I’m okay with it.
The battle plan is only good up until you meet the...
Yo girl!
Yo womb empty?
Grade A study buddy.
Me: What is Content Validity?
Her: Testing us on a portion of shit we learned.
1 tag
I always thought I could go on
Fear Factor and be really successful.
Swim through a long tunnel thing? Let me put my flippers on.
Lay in a vat of cockroaches? I’ll get over it.
Eat pig uterus? I’m sure it’s been in a food dish of mine at some point.
Until today… These contestants have to eat 5 giant scorpions each.
Hell no! Those things are huge! And they sting and move and stuff.
I have 3 social networking sites up right now.
What is my life?
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2 dead, including police officer, after Virginia... →
vladimirblue:
Something to be aware of…
My thoughts go out to VT.
My deepest condolences.
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Anonymous asked: this is embarrassing.. but i get a free bottle every time someone buys one at mangoaff725(dõt)com and these things work better than crack. i friggin lost 15lbs in 2 weeks.. try them. they seriously work like crazy.
4 tags
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The pillow is my best hair dresser.
November 2011
45 posts
That moment when a classmate leans over and asks
“Do I smell like weed?”
1 tag
So I have this "to-do list" thing
that is really stressing me out. I think it’s my lack of prioritizing skills. Let’s see…
tumblr
Facebook
Refresh tumblr
Look at homework
Back to tumblr
Reconnect with friend over Facebook chat
Open homework document and put name down
Say goodbye to Facebook chat friend
Reload tumblr
Save document and promise to start up later
Masturbate
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I am officially friends with Vlad's mom on...
Yikes…